Do you ever find yourself putting other people’s needs before your own? Talking harshly to yourself? Unable to forgive yourself for making a mistake? These are just a few ways that our negative beliefs show up in our actions. Often, many of these beliefs are in our subconscious, meaning we can’t specifically name them or have conscious awareness of them. This can be challenging because we don’t always know what to actually change or why we keep making decisions that sabotage our health and well-being.
Understanding Negative Beliefs
Most negative beliefs were learned in early childhood and adolescence. Before our prefrontal cortex develops around the age of 7 or 8, we take in the world without any filter. Everything we experience from our environment comes into our awareness without any discernment of whether something is right, wrong, good, or bad for us. These beliefs can come from witnessing how our parents or caregivers engaged in relationships and their life or by things that happened to us, how we were treated or taught. Some of us came from traumatic childhoods, while others from loving homes with parents who were just doing their best. Either way, looking at our beliefs we learned throughout our life is a process not of blame but of transformation and freedom.
5 Steps to Transform Negative Beliefs
1. Identify the Limiting/Negative Belief
Take out a journal and set up a quiet space. Write down the behaviors, decisions, or thoughts you have been noticing that are not serving you. Now write down what you would have to believe in order to make these decisions, have these thoughts, or behave in these ways.
For example, a woman wakes up with a migraine but begins cooking breakfast for everyone, getting lunches packed, letting her husband sleep in, and getting the kids ready for school. She doesn’t mention she isn’t feeling well to anyone. At work, she says yes to her boss on an extra project when she is already overwhelmed. Her husband calls and asks if it’s okay if he stays at work a little late to finish up, and she says yes, resulting in her having to pick up the kids and prepare dinner. She may have a limiting belief that she has to say yes or not disappoint someone in order to be liked/loved or that other people’s needs are more important than her own because she isn’t worthy or enough.
2. Discover Where This Belief Lives in Your Body
Close your eyes, think about or even say this negative belief out loud. Notice what happens in your body. Do you feel your throat tighten? Do you feel nausea? Is your breath shallow? Is your jaw clenched? Is there a pit or tightness in your belly? Are you tightening your pelvic floor? Learning how your body is holding these beliefs is crucial to transforming them. Take note of the different sensations and feelings that arise when you bring this belief into your awareness.
3. Reparenting/Bringing Safety
This is an integration step practiced during everyday moments. Now that you know the limiting/negative belief and where it shows up in your body, it’s time to tend to this part of you. When you notice the behavior or thoughts coming up that you journaled about in step 1, bring your hands to the place in your body you found in step 2. Take 3 deep breaths in through your nose and exhale out your mouth. Creating a sound or tone on the exhales is welcomed. After your breaths, speak to yourself as though you are a small child. Sayings such as, “It’s okay, you are safe,” “It’s okay to feel XYZ,” or “I’m sorry you feel like you aren’t enough or worthy” are validating statements that acknowledge and validate the part of you that feels this way. Ask yourself, “Would 2-year-old me believe this? Would they believe I have to be perfect to be loved?” Most will answer, “NO!” Because at that age of pure innocence, everything is love.
4. Transform Belief into Truth
After spending a few days reparenting and bringing safety to your body, it’s time to transform this belief. Set a space where you will not be disturbed. Sit or lie down comfortably. Start with 10 slow breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth, allowing your body to get heavy. With each exhale, allow another part of your body to release tension. Imagine a white light around your body like a container, protecting and supporting you. Picture a doorway in the distance. Walk towards it and open the door. As you step into this new space, notice someone walking towards you. This could be your future self, a parent, a mentor, or an elder. Share your limiting belief with them and ask what you need to know to transform it. Trust the process and the answers you receive. For example, transform “In order to receive love, I must be perfect” into “It is my birthright to receive love for who I am as I am.”
5. Integration
This belief has been part of your reality for a long time. It has kept you safe from being hurt or abandoned. We learned these beliefs as truths at a young age. It may be the first time you even entertain the idea that these are just beliefs and not actual truths! Gentleness and compassion for yourself are crucial when transforming your limiting/negative beliefs. Integration looks like repeating step 3 as often as needed. Every morning, before starting the day, alternate tapping each knee and repeating your truth, “It is my birthright to receive love for who I am as I am,” five times. It takes time, practice, and compassion. Interrupt the patterns as often as possible.
Final Thoughts
Changing our limiting and negative beliefs is a practice. Even after powerful somatic experiences, integration is essential. How we show up to our daily lives in the triggers and challenging experiences is how we transform. Practice daily, commit to yourself, and bring love and compassion. You deserve it! If you’ve experienced traumas in your life that feel impossible to move through, reach out to a practitioner who can support you. Network Spinal Chiropractors and Somatic Experiencing Practitioners are great places to start!
Ready to transform your negative beliefs into superpowers? Discover the healing power of chiropractic care in Denver with our expert team. Schedule a consultation today and start your journey to freedom and empowerment with Denver Network Chiropractic.
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